I am currently trying my best not to have an outer body experience! This past Friday night our neighbor's German Shepard, (probably still a puppy) came in our yard AGAIN. Circling around two our our daughters, (probably wanting to play). We don't have dogs, if we wanted dogs in our yard we would buy one. Anyway, I yelled across the way for them to get their dog out of our yard. ( I will leave the ugly language out) My husband yelled across the way, "If it happens again I will call the law. The dog went home. The neighbor lady, comes back to the edge of our property and said, "Sorry about that." I shot back, "Don't let it happen again." She said, " I said sorry about that." I said again, "Don't let it happen again." Yes, I was mad. Not the best reply but it could have been worse! Not to mention the dog jumped up and scratched one of the girls.
The lady leaves......then comes back. She started yelling at me that when she apologizies to me I damn well better accept it. I told her to get her blank off of my property, she said something else and went to cussing me like a crazy women. So up the hill I go. We got into one of the ugliest and loudest confrontations. Finally, she left. Saturday and Sunday she walks her dog along both sides of our property, it was obvious that she was trying to make a statemnt, she would turn around and come right back by. Drives her suv down the road, stops in front of our driveway and revs up her engine, not once but three times. Last night, her dog came after a little old lady that was walking her dog, I called up to the road to make sure the little lady was okay. She was, she said, "Why don't they have their dog in their yard?" She then said, "I'll just go home, guess I'm not supposed to walk my dog today." Maybe 5 minutes later the mean neighbor lady walks her dog by, on a leash talking loud and UGLY, just for me to hear I'm sure.
This morning, I take my girls to school come home and what do I find? In two of my flower beds the bird baths are knocked over, my beautiful Paperwhites have been cut, and I mean cut, perfect straight lines, the wind chime is on the ground, the cactus has been broken, the nandina is pulled out of the ground, roots and all and the hanging basket of wondering Jew is taken off the hook on the side of the tree and sitting on the ground. I was almost in tears. I called the law and filed a report. I just figured that after the yelling match on Friday, the walking of the dog close to our property and the revving of the suv it would die down and she would become the neighbor that I don't speak to. Apparently she has a problem with me because during the arguement, she said that I was a redneck white trash B--ch that didn't have a job and stayed bent over in my yard all the time. I told her that's because I have a husband that can take care of me. See she has been having an affair and all of that came out too. You see a lot of things when you stay home and observe the comings and goings of your neighbors. The entire neighborhood knows about her. My question is this............If I ignore her, as I have been doing this past weekend, it bothers her and if I say anything to her that will cause problems too. So, what would you do?
Yes, my feelings are hurt very badly about the damage she done to our yard. I know it was her. Everyone else around here stops to chat about my flowers. Over 5 years and NEVER has any of my things been disturbed, Oh other than a rocking chair was stolen from our front porch two years ago............Could that have been her?
29 comments:
Ignore the bat unless she comes onto your property. If the dog comes back leave it and call animal control. Some people are not worth getting up set about and ruining your mood. Do not let her control you!
I am so sorry but think you are better off ignoring her and avoiding interactions.
Oh my goodness Darla, I think she definitely has "issues". I would have called the police as well. I'm sorry to hear about this. It's sad when we can't be out in our own yards without having to worry about the neighbors animals. I don't understand why people who have animals don't take care of them. We live off a busy road and I see so many animals smashed on the road cause people let them run the neighborhood.
Let it go, Darla--or things could get worse. What does your hubby say? Could you put up a BIGGER privacy fence along there??? You might want to get some cameras to see if you can catch her in the act--if she destroys your property again. I'm always afraid of idiots like that--for fear they'll come out with a gun. Some people are NUTS you know.
Do you have a neighborhood association?? You could have a meeting with other neighbors and file some complaints about the dog.
My advice---IGNORE (if you can). Hopefully, she will NOW leave you alone????
Hugs,
Betsy
Oh Darla, nothing is worse than war with one of your neighbors!
Ignore the b**** because its obvious she has issues and she is looking for a fight! I can't believe she damaged some of your flowers! Maybe if you ignore her she will stop, but if she doesn't stop, you will have to take legal action against her!
So sorry! Keep up informed!
Love, Ann
Get a bigger dog and park it right at the property line. No, seriously. I'm so sorry to here she's giving you so much trouble. We have one of those around here. Your neighbor sounds a bit more malicious, so I hope ignoring her will help. You never know with people not dealing with a full deck.
you know what....If it was me and she called me those names I would have thought about jumping that fence and pounding her into the dirt! (thinking and doing are two very different things tho...rise above her level) You are a classy strong woman and you don't need this garbage. She obviously has not one ounce of respect for herself and therefore her jealousy over the hard work and the self control you obviously show for yourself makes her crazy.
Next time...simply call the cops!
verbal abuse and vandalizm are against the law. She is also using those dogs to hold that area hostage. If you call enough times...they will have to pay attention....good luck girl...I have a neighbor like this too.
sometimes I feel better just mentally punching her lights out. It really is sad that some feel better after hurting others.
O.K. when it comes to bothering your flowers, this is serious! No really, I understand but I agree with everyone. Let it go. Call the animal control and have the dog picked up if it comes back in your yard. Be the bigger woman. Ignoring her will drive her absolutely crazy. If anything else arises, let your husband or the law handle it. You cannot trust anyone these days.
I agree with the majority of comments here. Ignore her if at all possible. If her dog is loose, call animal control. If she comes on your property, call the police.
Wow! Is there any way you could get a restraining order against her? It sounds like she is harassing you.
I would definitely be documenting any exchanges and encounters. I would also ignore her in the future because anything you say could be used against you if there is a legal matter in the future. Definitely take the high road.
I have been ignoring this crazy lady all weekend, I think she is feeding off of me not reacting to her. If I do react then I'll be in jail. I'm just going to let it play out, I'm telling ya'll though, it gets you when you see your gardens and birdbaths purposely messed with. I did file a report with the cops incase of further damage. I have to call the cops if the dog is loose for them to see it in order for the animal control to issue a citation. It's against the law in FL to let a dog run free, a leash or a fence. Their back yard is fenced. We have a small area in the back fenced the front is not. Let you know if anything else happens,prayerfully not though.
That lady?! is beneath contempt Darla,I would just ignore her too, dont let her draw you in to a shouting match as this is her level.I would be very nervous of these dogs loose around children. They are lovely animals but have to be properly trained and controlled.
I feel so sorry for you. I know just what you are going thru. I had lots of trouble with my neighbor a couple years ago. I just act like they aren't there but I would certainly call the cops if you have any more damage. She's probably jealous of your gardens and the fact that you don't have to work.
People like that really scare me. Just walk away Darla and any further incidents go to police.
That is terrible. I think I would try to ignore her too. I also agree with documenting any intimidating things she does or anymore damage. Hopefully she'll get bored and move on.
My advice would be to avoid confrontation and document, document, document. Keep good notes recording date & time along with photographs every time anything is amiss or when you are harassed. If you have the occasion to require police assistance it will aid your case considerably.
Good luck Darla
Hi Darla, I am sorry too that this has happened. I agree with Gail, ignoring her would be for the best. But if that cannot happen since you live so close,(you may not want to hear this) but if you could find it in yourself to make up with her, I know I know impossible, she is terrible, etc. Kill her with kindness. Bake cookies, all is forgiven, lie through your teeth and say you love her dog. You get the idea. I know it is hard to do, but imagine the outcome. Everyone happy. Maybe she will even feel like keeping her dog tied up too, since you are such a nice person.
Frances
I say ignore her as well!
Doing an injury puts you below your enemy; Revenging one makes you but even with him; Forgiving it set you above him." Benjamin Franklin
So sorry to hear about this ugly incident Darla I'll 'boil' too if all my lovely flowers are ruin.
I had a nasty experience with my neighbour living above me many years ago. They kept knocking hard object at night while my babies were sleeping. They refused to tone down despite telling them nicely until one fine night I called the police. The police took down their identification number and warned them that's when they stopped the noise.
I say ignore her but be vigilant still. Any wrong move by her she's in trouble.
You hang in there and yes, she is not worth it.
Well it is like I said I sure hope the people that buy the house on each side and in front of my house. ARE NOT DERANGED ,People like that person can make your life miserable. Just keep doing your beautiful yard and pray for God's stength to resist retaliating
Patsy
I'm sorry all that happened to you, Darla. I think at this point, I would try to get the neighbor to agree to live in peace with you. I'd say that I was upset that her dog had scratched your daughter, and wasn't quite ready to accept the apology, but was willing to now, because that's what God would have you do, and that you would also forgive the other things she did. I'd let her know you don't want things to escalate further, and don't want to be uncomfortable when you see her, or something like that.
You know her and the situation better than I do, but I always want to make peace with everyone, and try to get them to be at peace with others as well. That doesn't mean you have to be friends, though.
You must have really gotten to her Darla! I say just kick her A$$ - I know you can do it!!! LOL!!
Just kidding, don't listen to me...just remember to document everything that she does and like Betsy said, security cameras are a good option if necessary. Nothing to fancy, something like a web cam or motion camera will do. Hopefully she saw the police when you filed the report and will now back-off.
I'm just like you minus the colorful words ;). I know how you feel and the fear for your daughters. I can tell you that she is dangerous. Her dog will pick up on that and be mean too. Of course....you were pretty fiesty to bring it on.
Now you have to deal with it. Get a very big fence for the backyard that will protect your girls. If the law ever gets involved, they will need to see that you made a good faith effort to make the situation better. Take Francis and Shirls advice as it will be your only advantage should she take you to court over anything.
I hate to paint an ugly picture and I certainly understand how mad it made you. I would get a video camera and record as many confrotations with her as possible. If she walks her dog so often, get her on video with her dog going after other people.
This is not someone who will play fair. I am so sorry about your garden and your kids. I feel very badly for you. Big hugs!
Girl...I have been thinking of you all darned day!!! I have not even looked at my email..just came straight over here!
What if you video recorded her...or taped her ignorance on a digital voice recording...
My husband put out signs that we had cameras all over as my next door nightmare was spraying roundup all over my yard...she single handedly killed three huge apple trees, 1/2 my lawn and most of my flower beds...one of the nice neighbors saw her do it!
She also smashed my birdbath with her empty beer bottle and started to call me "martha F--king Stuart" all the time. One night I had swallowed all that I could handle...stood up on the fence and called her out! Told her that since my kids were in bed...if she wanted to act like an animal...I was game...bring it the hell on! I told her that if she didn't stop...I would retaliate...and that she best leave me and my family alone. I also mentioned the "cameras" that we supposedly had installed and told her that I had her on tape destroying the gardens and property.
Once I stood up to her...(and scared the living hell out of her) she left me alone....for the most part...just told the rest of the street I was a sociopath...hey...now they all leave me alone! lol
hang in there girl. Keep me posted...since you have touched my nerve! lol
No messing with her when you are home alone tho...hear me?
I still think rising above her level is the best part...makes her feel even less classy than she already knows she is. Your beautiful gardens may suffer...but your dignity...will be in tact!
just don't take no chances with your safety...but don't swallow her crap either!
Instead of all those words, that become water and salt, with the anger and stress they cause...
Why not get a lawyer and do what
you have to do? Hit them where it hurts.
Get the evidence first. Place a couple of video cameras..It is more intelligent...
Without all the hollering, foul
language? What is the point?
Violence may erupt from either
side then what?
Wow Darla what gall that lady has. Dogs in TN are legally supposed to be confined to their property. We've had a similar problem here although we are casually friendly with the neighbors but I haven't spoken to them yet about this past weekend. They have a large lab/pit bull mix looking dog that charged my wife and daughter when they went to our own mailbox. It was just threatening so no injuries but it really got us irritated. I've been taking a few days to calm down before I talk to them. Animal owners are 100% responsible for keeping their animals under control. German shepherds can be very fierce protectors which also means that can be very dangerous to those not of the family. You have a every right to be concerned! Take pictures of the damage and any paw prints. Every time the woman does anything near your yard or family take a picture especially if it has the dog in it.
I think I would send her a short, simple letter letting her know that you've filed a police report and that your property will be closely monintored in the future.
I found your blog through Alan at Birds 'n Such. My neighbors and I had a similar problem that took a while to take care of. Fortunately, our children were not in danger. If you have time you can read about it here:
Part I
Part II
Part III
If the dog is off the leash, call animal control immediately, your daughter's safety is your first concern. I caught my criminal by catching her when she thought I was not looking. I do not know about Florida, but here any citizen can send any other citizen a letter, preferably certified telling them they are not allowed to trespass on your property. If they ever trespass, you can call the police and they can be charged, even if you can't catch her destroying property.
Good luck to you, I know how frustrating it is.
Now I understand the comment from you on another blog. It didn't sound like you at all, and I read it 3 times, going what? what? and then there were other comments about it. It was why I came to your blog next for my 3 week visit, I had to find out what was going on. Whew, have you had it bad while I was gone.
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